A Different Kind of Job Woe

It’s been a little over a month and a half since I lost my job. Since then, I’ve had two in-person interviews (I was not offered either job, at least as of yet) and this morning, I had a phone interview with another company. Considering that my layoff happened during pretty much the worst time of year for finding a job, I’m pretty proud of myself for making some headway.

A lot of people have asked me if I’m bored yet. With my trip to Florida,

#alttext#

Thanksgiving in Charleston,

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a trip to Asheville,

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Christmas in Seneca,

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and my mom coming to Atlanta tomorrow (all of which were planned before I lost my job), the answer is no. No, I’m not bored and for some reason, I feel guilty about that. It’s not necessarily that I feel like I should be bored, it’s more like guilt from enjoying not working.

I guess it has to do partially with the idea that you are defined by, at least to some degree, what you do for a living. Right now, I don’t do anything. I went from having what people thought was a super cool job (even though I wasn’t happy there) to baking banana bread, going to the gym and cleaning the house (which somehow is still dirty) all day. It’s not that I feel like I’m a failure because of it. I know that my job performance had absolutely nothing to do with being laid off and that I am a good worker. It’s more that I feel like if I’m enjoying what’s essentially almost two months of laid back weekend days (with less going out), it means that I’m not trying hard enough to find a job or that I’m being lazy about it.

Though others may disagree, I’m not a lazy person. I require more sleep than other people, that’s true, but tired is not the same as lazy. I have hobbies, I push myself physically and I create opportunities for myself, both professionally and personally. But for some reason, it makes me incredibly nervous to admit that I like doing nothing, that I am enjoying it. It’s like I fight those feelings or feel bad about having them. Financially, I really want to find a job and obviously I want to find one that I enjoy and can thrive doing, but if you take the financial aspect out of it, staying home all day is kind of nice.

I know that come the new year, I will find a new job and hopefully, I will like it more than the one that I left. And when I am setting my alarm again and not worrying so much about money, I will look back on the however many months that I was unemployed (hopefully it’s just two) and wish that I’d let myself enjoy them a little more.

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24 Responses to A Different Kind of Job Woe

  1. I’m glad you’ve had trips, etc to keep you busy! You will totally get something soon. Keep pushing!

  2. I’ve been there (and am again). I loved the period of time I didn’t have a job and loved being home. Now I really want to stay home, but financially, that just can’t happen…

  3. No need to feel guilty. I know I would like doing nothing. I’m very good at it, but I can understand why you’re having those feelings. We live in such a work-driven society.

  4. :) I feel like all my friends are rushing to go to gradschool and I would love to just sit and do nothing. Not literally do nothing, but have things on my terms so that I can do what I want, when I want to.
    Enjoy this time :)

  5. Great way to think about it. I’m glad you are enjoying this time and all of your trips.
    I too wish staying home had a nice income to go along with it. :)

  6. Fingers crossed this last phone interview will turn into something!! I like your attitude and you’re right – Q1 is SUCH a great time to find a job – after the holidays, people who are holding out for bonuses get them & roll, etc. – i’m just glad you’re enjoying your time and your travels!

  7. You have a wonderful attitude. I hope you’ll find a great job very soon in the new year.

  8. The right job will come for you, until then, enjoy this time for just you!

  9. You seriously just said so many feelings that I think a lot of people have but don’t want to admit. Having some downtime is nice. I don’t think that makes a person lazy at all. Doing nothing is necessary every now and then. We can’t go-go-go all the time. I like doing nothing, but I agree- it feels bad to admit that. I’m really glad you wrote this post. And ditto to fitting back in- my fingers are crossed as well!

  10. Oh girl, you are NOT lazy and should not feel that way at all! You are doing your best to look for work in a very tough time of year (and economy) and hell – while you’re *not* working, what’s wrong with enjoying the time in between job hunting?? It’s not like you can legit spend ALL DAY looking for a job afterall. I think you should embrace this time and not let guilt get the best of you — my husband struggled with that at first when he was laid off but after awhile, he came to terms with it, did what he could to find work and did what he could in between that to make improvements to the house, help out a friend in need, stuff like that. In the end, you’re doing great, trust that, ok?

  11. I agree with others that have sad you’re saying what anyone else in this situation probably feels, but doesn’t wanna say! And I hope writing this out makes you feel better, because you shouldn’t feel guilty! It’s a good time to reset and when you get a job, you’ll be even more appreciative of this time!

  12. Don’t feel guilty at all! This is the time of year to be jobless (if there’s ever a good time). So much to do! Plus, you’ve spent your entire adult lfe working. 2 months “off” is well-deserved.

  13. I struggle with that feeling too sometimes. The way we’ve worked it out is that Jeff does all the work in our household that earns an income and I do all the work that doesn’t. It’s all work that has to get done, so as long as it’s not financially straining, it makes the most sense for me to do that part of the workload; and it helps that I can do it during normal work hours so that when Jeff comes home neither of us have to worry about grocery shopping or folding clothes.

    Sometimes though, even though I’m using this unemployed time to learn new skills for a new career direction, I can’t help but feel like I’m being lazy and becoming boring even though I know the knowledge I used to have from my marketing job didn’t define me or make me interesting either. You have a good attitude to just try to enjoy it and be thankful that you have the opportunity to take a break. You’ll be back to work doing something you enjoy in no time.

  14. evil ex came home one day while i was laid off and got ANGRY and said “how on earth can you just stay home all day????”…it wasn’t about my lack of a job, he knew i was trying, it was critical of me being content with a simple day. i HAD searched for work and done a good two hour walk…plus he had our only car. i pointed out it was kinda good i COULD occupy myself w/o having to go spend money on some sort of activity.

  15. First, you are so pretty. Really. You are glowing in all of these photos! And I super love the cracker in the mouth picture. A wonderful job is out there for you when the time is right, and I implore you to enjoy your time off in the meantime. As someone who hasn’t had a real vacation in 8ish years (and a house that could use a serious deep cleaning even though we just moved there in June), I would kill for some time off. ;)

  16. I actually think I’d go nuts without a job (even though I complain all the time) ;)

  17. I definitely think you should enjoy this time! I don’t think there’s anything to feel guilty about, but you’re right- people are so defined by their professions that society makes us feel guilty if we’re not busy, busy, busy all the time. Good luck finding a job!

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  19. Been there. It sucks. I’m so sorry you feel this way, but hopefully this is just prepping you up for the next big thing. Whenever I hate my job (which is more often than I’d like to admit), I remind myself of how awful it was hunting for a job.

  20. No need to feel guilty for that! Being at home is awesome! During my break, I have been enjoying my afternoons off, and it makes me wish I could be one of those richy-rich SAHMs who can afford to stay at home AND employ a nanny or send kids to daycare part-time or something. I feel so busy all the time during these “off” hours; I wonder how I do it during my regular work schedule!

  21. Don’t feel guilty! It makes perfect sense to enjoy a bit more freedom and less stress for awhile. Enjoy it while you can. And have a great weekend with your mom!

  22. Enjoy where you are. It goes by all too quickly.

    And truth be told, I really enjoy being at home, making my own schedule and cooking all day long. Maybe it’s time to find a job that will let you still do those things!

  23. Bah, sometimes having a couple month break is great to figure out priorities and rediscover passions is fantastic!

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